Overcoming The Fear Of Rejection

Why are we so afraid of being rejected?  Why does it feel so badly?  Firstly,  it's all in our heads. If we get rejected it has NOTHING to do with what is going on with us.  It is the rejectors issue.  We can not begin to be responsible to for another's rejection.  However, we seldom spend time with that thought and we allow the thought of inferiority and self doubt to permeate our head space. Dancing teaches us to ask and accept non verbal rejection.  If a leader leads and the follower does not follow; is it the leaders fault?  It is so subjective, there a litany of answers; depends on this and that, and thus and so. 

If you ask, apply or invite another,  and are rejected, put it into perspective.  " I knew I was too fat" or "I knew I'm not tall enough" or " I knew my skill set wasn't high enough for that position" or " I knew I couldn't sing or dance as well as that person. " Do you see how crazy it is to actually take on the responsibility of the rejection?  It may have NOTHING to do with any of those thoughts that one has.  We will never know exactly what the rejector is thinking, even if they give an explanation it could be erroneous.  Heck, they may not even know themselves. 

Take this golden opportunity to see the rejection as motivation and strength. Maybe you did want to lose a few pounds, or take a Yoga class and improve your posture.  Or maybe you want to take a class and better your skill set in a specific area or take that voice lesson.  Or better yet, reframe the rejection; "oh well, I guess that person is missing out on a fabulously unique opportunity that I will have to give another."  Flip the feelings of sadness, disappointment and anger to vitality, motivation and excitement.

You deserve whatever you want and you have to get good at asking. You will be rejected, that is a good thing, it is getting you closer to your goal.  Be clear on what you want, ask it with deliberate intention and powerful energy.  You will see magic happen.